How do I know I love him?

One look at his face and I see my tomorrow

 

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Red Flags

You should’ve ran away when he first laughed at his sister’s hobbies.

When he told her to be “normal” and “be a girl” because no one reads that much, or no one cares so much about women’s rights.

You should’ve ran away when you saw how he treated his mother,

Disrespectful and no regard for her sacrifices.

Who asks for an exchange when a mother asks a favour? Is her love not enough?

 

You should’ve ran away when he treated you like shit. But you didn’t see it that way.

I did.

He made you beg like some kind of dog who needed attention.

 

You should’ve ran away long ago when you could. Because you never trusted him, you should’ve trusted you.

 

But you were too kind to believe that he was nothing but a nice guy. You didn’t see it coming when he broke you when everything seemed perfect.

 

You should’ve ran away but you gave him a choice instead.

And he chose to hurt you.

The Failure of a Man

I don’t understand the mind of a cheater. How can a man promise marriage to a woman and break it so easily without looking back? No remorse, no regrets. It pains me to think about the woman whose life broke so quickly. There was no indication of strain in their relationship. They were happy. They were engaged. And yet, in a blink of an eye, the man turned his back away from the woman like she was garbage waiting to be thrown. But she was not garbage. She was gold. He threw away something of high value and replaced it with a used dish rag. No respect for the woman at all. I only know that karma will strike the man and that the woman did not lose him; he lost her.

One day, the woman will realize that the man was a monster all along. One day, she will shake her head and laugh. One day, she will finally understand why the heavens steered her to another direction. One day, she will heal.

In An Alternate Universe

If I lived in a fairy tale, this would have been our story:

We met at a market in Agrabah, on an unusual day where a pretentious Prince Ali paraded the most exotic of animals for a certain Princess Jasmine. The perfect moment came when I pushed through the throngs of people to satiate my desperate need of water. Parched and ready to die under the Moroccan sun, I spotted the lone ice cold bottle of water and reached for it. Like fate, a beautiful set of manly hands also grabbed the bottle and we touched, hand to hand, skin to skin. I don’t know if the fireworks I saw were the ostentatious display from the parade, or my heart dancing and cartwheeling when our eyes met. His eyelashes longer than vines captured me in a trance and I smiled and he smiled, also. And just like that, the moment Prince Ali fell for Princess Jasmine, was also the moment our lives intertwined. We fell in love and it brought us to a whole new world. The end.

But this is not our story and while I could write whatever I want about our love life, we started our story in the simplest of ways and I could never have asked for a better version. By God’s will and my friend’s “shipping” powers, we fell in love and began writing the most beautiful love story there is.

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone. Make good choices.

 

To the brim

I do not think I give you enough love to fill you. One hundred percent, no, one hundred more.

And more.

Until the glass is no longer half empty, nor half full, but overflowing. Until the oceans swallow the earth. But not you. Stay afloat, my love, and sail towards the unending stream of joys and heartaches; the memories of you and I, always together. Drift into my heart, as I to you.

Always and forever.

Here’s a thought I’ve never thought of

My relationship started in the beginning of 2015 and my reading drought started in early 2015 as well. I have been thinking that maybe the reason why I didn’t try so hard to go back to my fantasy was because my reality is finally so much better.

What I read in romance novels before was happening before my eyes…was happening to me. For the longest time, I did not seek the thrill of reading someone else’s first date or someone else’s first kiss because I was living my first date, my first kiss and more. And for that long moment, I am finally living in the fantasy that I used to read. I have my own prince charming, my knight in shining armor. I have my own man to sweep me off my feet, to hug me because I needed it and kiss me because I deserved it.

I used to fantasize about what it feels like to get butterflies in the stomach, goosebumps in the skin and chills in the body. And it feels good. I do not live vicariously through the lives of fictional characters anymore. I do not feel the second-hand emotions from a girl who finally realized that she is someone’s number one. Because I finally realized that there is this boy who is willing to cross oceans just to make me feel that I am important and loved. Here is a boy who, despite being worlds apart, sought me out to make sure that I know he is still there, waiting for me.

And then it came to that moment when both our worlds collided. And it started there, a new beginning, a new love story that I began to write in my reality.